🧠 Something strange is happening down south.
“’Merica wants to be Canadian again… but without the humility, healthcare, or hockey sense.” ... #MAGAUnplugged #WakeUpWithHumor #CanadaVsAmerica #Satire #AmeriCanada
’Merica Wants to Be Canadian Again :)
“We’re not better. Just quieter about it.”
— Every Canadian Ever
A subtle shift in the air...
Less “USA! USA!”
More “Oh God, what now?”
It’s like a whole country just woke up with a hangover, looked in the mirror, and whispered:
“Maybe… maybe we should’ve just stayed Canadian.”
Oh, they won’t say it out loud… not in front of their Fox News stepdad or QAnon aunt but the signs are there:
Sudden interest in universal healthcare memes
Suspicious Googling of “dual citizenship Canada”
Unexplained cravings for maple syrup and manners
Saying “sorry” once in a while and wondering why it feels... right
💣 The Great American Identity Crisis…
Let’s be honest.
America’s brand is a bit… dented.
It’s like watching a once-great rock star do a reunion tour—but now the guitar is out of tune, the pyrotechnics are just smoke machines, and the crowd is mostly bots.
They traded in their big shining city on a hill…
for a conspiracy-filled strip mall.
And suddenly, the Canadian model—modest, polite, occasionally boring—looks like a luxury spa retreat.
“Wait… they don’t go bankrupt from a broken arm?”
“You mean… they trust science?”
“Hold up. Their elections are… calm?”
The horror.
🍁 Canada: Earth’s Emotional Support Country
You ever notice how many Americans keep popping up in Canadian Facebook groups?
Sneaking into our comments like:
“Hey… uh… do you guys have room for one more?”
“Asking for me and 332 million friends.”
We’re like their emotionally balanced ex.
The one who moved on.
Who reads.
Who recycles.
And now, after years of gaslighting us with “We’re the greatest country in the world!”
They’re peeking over the border whispering:
“Sooo… what’s your immigration process like?”
🪓 It’s Not About Being Better
(Though let’s be real… we’ve got our act a little more together.)
It’s about un-learning the toxic mythologies.
The idea that being loud is the same as being right.
That exceptionalism means you don’t have to improve.
That freedom means “I can do whatever I want” instead of “We take care of each other.”
The flags got bigger.
The slogans got dumber.
And the systems cracked under their own weight.
So now, at 3AM, America’s sending that classic breakup text:
“Hey. Just thinking about you. Hope you’re good.
Miss the way you… handled pandemics and didn’t elect sociopaths.”
🔧 Your Turn, Reader
If you're from the States… I see you.
You’re not alone.
Not every American drinks the MAGA Kool-Aid.
Some of you are damn sharp.
But if your gut’s whispering, “This ain't it…”
It might be time to unplug and un-learn.
Because what’s broken down there isn’t just the system.
It’s the belief that learning from someone else is weakness.
Here’s the truth, whispered politely with a Canadian accent:
“It’s okay to change your mind, eh?”
🧷 Tags: #UnLearn #PoliticalSatire #GeezerWiseRant #CanadaVsAmerica #MAGAUnplugged #WakeUpWithHumor #Satire #AmeriCanada
📌 P.S. Thinking of making a break from American brain fog?
This Un-Learn section is your clean air, your cultural detox, your mental igloo.
It’s not about bashing.
It’s about breaking free.
One idea at a time.
🧠 “I ain’t here to sell you dreams. I’m here to wake you the hell up.”
— Fred Ferguson (GeezerWise)
I write to un-teach what broke you and rewire what still works.
If you're into uncomfortable truths, smart-ass wisdom, and making a damn living without selling your soul — you’re in the right place.
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⚙️ Powered by hard-won lessons, late-night clarity, and a deep dislike of bullshit.
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— Fred
aka GeezerWise
💬 What do you think ‘Merica would have to un-learn to earn Canadian citizenship?
Let’s hear it in the comments.